Pregnancy turned out to be a breeze for me every appointment was perfect.
Every scan and every test where always on point. Throughout my pregnancy, I was very aware of the changes my body was going through, and I was very in tune with my baby’s movements and everything going on around me. It wasn’t until the morning of Monday the 13th of July where I didn’t feel any movement and I thought maybe as the baby is getting bigger and moving into different positions, she wouldn’t be moving as much. It wasn’t until that night after I had eaten dinner that I still hadn't felt any movement. This was when I started to panic and consulted my partner Charley. We then proceeded to contact my midwife who suggested we go to the hospital straight away to be assessed.
Once we got to the hospital, they took us in straight away to try and find the baby’s heartbeat. You can only imagine the stress and pain of uncertainty during this time. A midwife settled us in a room and put the heart rate monitor on in search of a heartbeat, and as time went on we couldn’t hear anything?
She then went on to call the obstetrician to do a bedside ultrasound. We had to wait at least 15 minutes for him to arrive it was probably the longest and hardest 15 minutes of our lives. The obstetrician then proceeded to do a bedside ultrasound where he found no heartbeat. We were in complete shock. We couldn’t comprehend what had happened- how could this happen? Why is this happening? Is this a mistake? We didn’t understand. After some time we made the decision to go home, and we had to come back the next day for a final ultrasound to confirm what the obstetrician had suspected.
As the next day approached we packed our bags and headed to the hospital, ready for what the next 24 hours were going to throw at us. We had a confirmation ultrasound which found no abnormalities but confirmed there was definitely no heartbeat. We then had to make the decision on how we would deal with the next step which was delivering the baby. I opted for a natural birth, as I owed it to myself and my baby. I was induced later that afternoon and gave birth with my partner by my side the following morning 15th July at 8:47am to our beautiful baby girl Kora by my amazing midwife Clare Burke. We were lucky enough to spend as much time as we needed with her, taking in every special moment we had. The staff at Moruya hospital were amazing and so accommodating, and they made the worst situation into the best and were able to attend to every possible need we had.
After the delivery, we were then informed that there was a true knot in the umbilical cord which was a result of Kora being born still. A true knot causes the cord to compress which restricts blood and oxygen causing the baby to pass due to hypoxia.
I guess no one prepares you for pregnancy or what is to follow. All I know is that you need to stay strong and channel your inner strength, and just know everything from this point on is all for your beautiful angel.
Written by Jenna Lantouris & Charley Alderman in Memory of Kora Alderman, stillborn on Wed 15/7/2020.